Friday, March 2, 2012

Day 7....

Well today makes one week since I received the news from my Doctor and two weeks from the time of first symptoms.  Wow, my life is completely different now.  God has changed my view on life, especially redefining what is important.  I have received an overwhelming amount of response and encouragement from those that I have known along the way to people I have never met.  Kara had one of her best customers contact her to recommend doctors in Colorado to her if we didn't have any here and to tell us that his family is praying for us.  One of my childhood friends contacted me to tell me that they have put me on her prayer wall at church and that 450 people that I have never met are praying for me in Virginia.  The Lord has been absolutely amazing in working things out this past 7 days.  I know without a doubt that He is going to do something amazing and I want everyone to witness it.  I can't wait for Him to show off!   Over the last few days it feels that I have the clearest view of my life ever.  At band practice last night, I was able to play and sing each song (Singing from memory)  I know that doesn't sound like much but I am not exactly coordinated enough to do so on a regular basis.  I typically can do one or the other but not both.    i is like a fog has been lifted from my mind is the only way to describe it.
       Yesterday at Wake Forest went pretty good.  I met with the doctor and he discussed the different philosophies of treating the tumor.  He was unable to look at my MRI but had talked to the doctor from Monday.  The next step is for him to meet with the others on the "Tumor Board" at Wake on Tuesday.  This is a group of doctors from all forms of treatment (Chemo, Radiation, Neurosurgeons, etc) that will all work together to figure out the best plan for getting rid of the tumor.  So Tuesday or Wednesday I should  be able to find out the next step.  The doctor said that it will probably be getting a biopsy, which would mean drilling into my head and letting the air out.  From there they will be able to see what kind of tumor it really is and then start treating it.
       If there is anything that I have learned this week is that God is not a mean God, He does have what is best in mind for us.  Now what I think is best for me and what He does I am sure is totally two diffent things.  My idea would be a nice house at St. Thomas with a boat, but God knows better than me what is fulfilling and what counts.  Each day I am here I have found joy in the little things that I never paid attention to.  Talking to someone I don't know and getting to know them...hearing their story, Aksing someone how they are and actually waiting for an answer, wanting to do for others than just making myself content.  These are little things I have noticed now that I enjoy.  I am sure I will have many more revealed to me.
       I will quit rambling, there is just one thing that I want you to think about that my pastor and I discussed yesterday.  We were talking about now that I have this tumor he started telling me that there is no way of knowing how many days I have and I interruped him before he could finish and said "Neither do you.." he said that was the point he was going to make.  I have been blessed with having my eyes opened to the fact none of us have an expiration date on our birth certificate.  I am now more deliberate about living my life now.  I try not to waste time or should not either.

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